Random (but not really)

Friday, January 17, 2020

Goals

I never make new year’s resolutions.

They don’t work for the majority of people, and I don’t need the guilt of failure.

But that doesn’t mean goals aren’t important.

I had a list of goals I wanted to achieve before I turned 40.

Thus I decided. What I want to do by the time I turn forty is to be comfortable with myself as I am. I want to be able to look in a mirror and be happy with what I see, and be comfortable in my own skin.

And I think I did okay! I learned how to put on makeup (even if I still never wear it), I learned how to deal with my hair, and I worked very hard to become comfortable with my body. The latter is still (of course) a work in progress, but I’m so much better at accepting myself as I am than I was in my 20s.

I achieved a lot over the past decade as well, aside from my goals. I went to Alaska (twice!), I left jobs that made me miserable and found a job I absolutely love, we hiked all the state parks and forests in WV, and I’ve learned a ton of new skills as I’ve taken on renovation and building projects I never would have considered myself capable of.

So I’m thinking about what goals I want to achieve by the time I’m fifty–which is this year.

So as part of my continuing goal of working to accept myself as I am, what might be some fun goals in the coming months, towards self-acceptance and becoming a better human.

Caveat: my mental health comes first, so it can’t be anxiety-inducing, or dangerous such as attempting tasks that are beyond me (sword-fighting with edged weapons (too clumsy), walking on a high wire (no sense of balance), memorizing pi (I can’t hold numbers in my brain), or becoming a portrait painter (I lack hand-eye coordination); you’ll note that a lot of things things are due to my lack of coordination–something I AM comfortable with.)

I’ve thought about a photo shoot. A friend of mine did one for her 50th and it was so lovely and marvelous and just accepting of her as she is. I’ve considered changing my fitness goals. I need more weight-wearing exercise, but I find it SO. BORING.

So any thoughts for goals I might set and or how I might achieve and change what I have been doing?

Written by Michelle at 12:02 pm    

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Categories: Random Notes from All Over  

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Time or Money

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about work and time and poverty.

That would be because I’m currently not working. (Short version: last year this time I was physically ill from the way my supervisor bullied me, so I quit, because I didn’t deserve to be treated that way.)

I was terrified by that decision, but almost immediately my health issues ceased, so I realized I’d made the right choice, and tried not to worry about money.

Over the spring and summer I worked for several months through a staffing agency, but instead of taking a permanent position that wouldn’t make me happy in the long run, I decided to go back to job hunting. However, that’s not the point of this.

A couple months into not working I discovered something: Except when we spent money on expensive items I was using for house projects (I re-protected our wood floors and the repaired, re-protected, and recovered the kitchen chairs), our expenses remained below our income.

I tend to be frugal with money, but I was still surprised that we weren’t hemorrhaging money. I mean, we no longer had almost half our previous income, so how we were keeping our heads above water?

After a lot of thought, I realized it came down to multiple things.

1. I’ve spent the last decade paying off debts and building up our savings.

Currently, the only debt we have is our mortgage. All student loans are paid off, the car is paid off, we have no outstanding credit card debt. This means that not only do we have a cushion, but also that the only money that has to go out each month is for the mortgage and utilities and necessities.

2. We have only one car, it is relatively new, and we have done regular maintenance on it.

When we purchased our car we focused on reliability and gas mileage, because I’ve owned unreliable cars before and I hated them. HATED them. This means that we have escaped the unexpected expenses that come with a car that breaks down, as well as the related problem of trying to finagle rides while the car is in the shop and all that time suck. (We get our car maintenance at a place within walking distance of both our house and Michael’s work. The car gets dropped off on his way to work, and picked up on his way home. Basically: no time lost.)

3. We’ve replaced every single appliance in our house since we bought it.

All those unexpected expenses of a broken furnace or washing machine have already happened. It also means that the new appliances are more energy-efficient than the old, so they cost less to run.

4. Because I am not working, I have time to bake and cook; This has decreased our food bill far more than I ever would have expected.

One reason is we no longer have days where we both come home from work and neither of us wants to make dinner. Eating at home is far cheaper than going out to eat, of course, but on top of that, buying ingredients is cheaper than buying prepared items. I’ve also had lots of time to freeze and can fruits and vegetables from the Farmers Market (I did this before, but it did take part or all of a weekend). All of which means that our food bill is much much less than it had been.

It also means that I’ve had time to expand my repertoire in the kitchen, and to get more recipes down pat, so if I don’t want to spend much time cooking, I have multiple recipes that require little time and effort, and come together quickly because I’m familiar with them. All of which means that I’m making a wider variety of dinners, which means I don’t want to go out to eat as much, since I haven’t had the same meals in rotation for a month (or year). Realizing that I can make something more delicious than I’d get at most restaurants is even further encouragement to cook, so it’s a self-rewarding cycle.

All which brings me to my point: Poverty isn’t laziness.

We can get by with less money because I have the time to do things that save money in the long run. If we were making the same amount of money and both of us were working, it would be a struggle to make ends meet, because I would no longer have the time to cook and take care of house maintenance.

But more importantly, we can get by with less money because I’m starting from a far more secure place than most people: We have a reliable car. We have savings. Our monthly bills are low because we have energy efficient appliances, a fuel efficient car, and a cheap mortgage.

Terry Pratchett of course said all this much more elegantly in Men at Arms:

The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.

Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of okay for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. These were the kinds of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.

But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that’d still be keeping his feet dry in ten years time, when a poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.

We don’t have to keep repairing our car. We don’t have to keep repairing or replacing broken appliances. We don’t have to spend a lot of money on gas, because we were able to purchase a fuel-efficient car. We don’t have high utility bills, because we were able to purchase energy-efficient appliances.

We don’t have to keep buying new boots.

This is why the myth of the lazy poor outrages me so very much.

I have lived struggling to make ends meet before. Where the car breaking down not only meant a struggle to come up with the money but also time wasted trying to get around without a car. Where I had to work an exhausting job, with a schedule that changed from week to week, where my sleep patterns were constantly interrupted and I rarely get two days off in a row. And heaven forbid I get sick.

Instead, I am in a place where I spent money in the past so I could save money in the future.

Where I have the time to spend less money.

I know precisely how lucky I am to be in the situation I am and it’s not because I’m more moral or smarter or less lazy. It’s because I got lucky.

And for this, I am thankful every single day.

Written by Michelle at 2:23 pm    

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Categories: Politics,Random Notes from All Over  

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

This Is Awesome

In today’s mail:

West Virginia Stamped Letter

West Virginia Stamped Letter

Bravo Greatland Graphics, you just made my day!

Written by Michelle at 5:19 pm    

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Categories: Alaska,Fun & Games,Random Notes from All Over,West Virginia  

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Merry in Marietta

Went to Ripley with my brother and sister-in-law, then went over to Marietta for dinner, and after dinner walked around the city (which is surprisingly pretty) to make room for ice cream.

Driftwood & Stone

Nobody seemed to understand why I hiked down to look at the stone used to build the levee. Well, I thought it was interesting anyway.

Sturdy

Michael thought it was for hitching horses. I suggested that more likely it was for boats. But that would seem to make sense only if the river was higher at one point.

Where the Sidewalk Ends

Where the sidewalk ends.

Written by Michelle at 9:58 am    

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Categories: Photos,Random Notes from All Over  

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Out and About

Sunday morning Michael & I woke up at 5:00 AM to drive to the Pittsburgh airport to fly to Orlando for his conference. 5:15 we got in the car and discovered that the noise that had awakened me at 1:30 AM was a rock breaking our windshield.

Unsurprisingly, it is really difficult to find someone at 5:30 AM on a Sunday morning to drive you to an airport more than an hour away, especially when everyone who you might call at 5:30 AM is out of town. We started to drive to Pittsburgh, but as soon as we were on the interstate realized it was a terrible idea, and so regrouped at the truck stop at Mount Morris.

I’d like to take a moment here to say that USAA may be the best insurance company in the entire world. Sitting in a truck stop I called the insurance company, and was able to arrange everything to get the windshield taken care of. The only thing I had to do on my own was arrange to get the car back to Morgantown after the windshield was fixed. One phone call, 30 minutes, and everything was taken care of. You can’t imagine what a relief that is–or perhaps you can.

Luckily, the airline has a policy that as long as you arrive within 2 hours of your flight, they’ll rebook you on a new flight, so we did in fact make it to Orlando–finding a ride was actually the most difficult part of the morning.

Even better, the rest of the trip was entirely uneventful. Michael’s conference was (of course) in an insanely expensive hotel, and (of course) there was absolutely nothing within walking distance, so I had no choice but to eat at the hotel restaurants. Although expensive, the food was very good, and I got away with only eating a late breakfast and an early dinner. I also did a lot of walking along the lakes–they had a very nice footpath. Though in retrospect, I’m thinking perhaps I should have stuck to sneakers instead of wearing sandals. (Yes, I did see the aftermath of this–rumor is he or his wife was there for the conference Michael was attending, but there were several conferences going on. Don’t know anything for certain.)

I took my camera and took pictures, but am having issues with the exposure on my PowerShot–or I’ve just been spoiled by my Rebel–so it seems like the better pictures were actually taken with my cell phone, which is just….wrong.

Last Morning in Orlando

I was fascinated by the boccee court, but couldn’t really find a good way to photograph it.
(more…)

Written by Michelle at 12:21 pm    

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Categories: Non-Sequiturs,Photos,Random Notes from All Over  

Friday, July 24, 2009

Delayed in Charlotte

Due to problems with the plane, we are spending the night in Charlotte instead of Anne’s house in Denver.

But, I’m on vacation, and Michael is with me, so it’s okay.

Written by Michelle at 9:29 pm    

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Categories: Random Notes from All Over,UCF  

Friday, January 23, 2009

Stressful Friday

If you’ve been following along at home, you’ll remember that today is my Dad’s surgery.

We’re off to Wheeling, where I may or may not be without Internet access for the next several days. I’m taking my new netbook, and I have hopes for at least getting access through Michael’s phone, but at the very least I’ll have my cell phone, so I’ll be twittering (however, unless I have Internet access, I won’t be seeing what anyone else says for awhile.)

So I’ve got a bag full of magazines, a netbook, and a cell phone. So I should be plenty distracted.

I hope.

Written by Michelle at 8:00 am    

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Categories: Random Notes from All Over,Science, Health & Nature  

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