Paranormal Bromance (2014) Carrie Vaughn

What happens with three Gen-X slackers are turned against their will?

They become roommates.

After being turned, I had been terribly disappointed to learn that vampires still had to do laundry, that we didn’t have some supernatural power that kept our clothing ageless and immortal as well.

That bit goes just how you’d expect.

The Family, run at the time by an okay guy named Arturo, offered to help us adapt to our new nocturnal lives. We could have stayed with him and others of his Family in his underground compound, worked for him, and he’d have looked after us and made sure we were fed. That sounded too much like moving back home, so the three of us found a basement apartment and decided to fend for ourselves.

It’s a fun story and a quick read.

The truth of the matter is, Gen X-ers make terrible vampires.

There are references to Kitty the Werewolf and of course Rick makes an appearance, but the story is centered on Sam and his roommates, and their being tangentially being pulled into vampire politics.

Rating: 8.5/10

Kitty’s Mix-Tape (2020) Carrie Vaughn

“Kitty Walks On By, Calls Your Name” (2020)
“It’s Still the Same Old Story” (2011) Down These Strange Streets
“The Island of Beasts” (2018) Nightmare, December 2018.
“The Beaux Wilde” (2014) Urban Fantasy Magazine, December 2014.
“Unternehmen Werwolf” (2013) Halloween: Magic, Mystery, and the Macabre
“Kitty and the Full Super Bloodmoon Thing” (2015)
“Kitty and Cormac’s Excellent Adventure” (2020)
“Sealskin” (2015) Operation Arcana
“The Arcane Art of Misdirection” (2012) Hex Appeal
“What Happened to Ben in Vegas” (2020)
“Kitty and the Super Blue Blood or Whatever Moon Thing” (2018)
“Defining Shadows” (2011) Those Who Fight Monsters
“Bellum Romanum” (2017) Urban Enemies
“Kitty Learns the Ropes” (2010) Full Moon City
“Kitty Busts the Feds” (2020)

I have always liked Carrie Vaughn’s short stories, and in fact one of her short stories–that is actually in this volume–is one of my favorite fantasy-mystery short stories.

The Kitty series was finished in 2015. The Immortal Conquistador, which features on of my favorite characters from the series, came out this fall. This collection is stories that didn’t make the first anthology, Kitty’s Greatest Hits (2011).

Surprisingly–or perhaps not given how much I read–there were several stories I had no memory of reading. Which is fine, because then I got to enjoy them again.

“Kitty Walks on By, Calls Your Name” tells of Kitty’s 10th high school reunion. It was unusually over-the-top for a Kitty story.

“It’s Still the Same Old Story” is a Rick story that I’d read before, set in the present with flashbacks to 60 years earlier. Despite his age, Rick has kept far more of his humanity than many other vampires in this would, and that might be in part because he continues to allow himself human friends.

“The Island of Beasts” is a story that is NOT a kitty story and doesn’t seem to have any characters we’d met previously. It’s set in the early 1800s, and follows a young female werewolf who is exiled to (dumped on) an island that is home to werewolves who cannot follow the rules set by their master.

“The Beaux Wilde” is another story that occurs outside of the Kitty timeline with none of the Kitty characters, sometimes in the 1800s, where a young woman is being encouraged by her family to get married, but because she can feel others thoughts, she’d rather be a spinster than marry someone who has no respect for her.

I liked this story quite a lot.

“Unternehmen Werwolf” is set during WWII, and stems from the stories that Hitler used the supernatural.

“Kitty and the Full Super Bloodmoon Thing” is more a silly excerpt than a full-fledged short story.

“Kitty and Cormac’s Excellent Adventure” is interesting in that it is essentially Kitty and Cormac playing a bit part in someone else’s story–a story that you will never learn.

I love the idea of it and how it makes a perfect short story.

“Sealskin” takes place a generation after “The Temptation of Robin Green”. I really like how this story ended.

“The Arcane Art of Misdirection” is an Odysseus Grant story, set in Vegas. I feel like Odysseus got short shrift in this series, in that he’s a fascinating character, but we never really learn much about it.

“What Happened to Ben in Vegas” is more of an outtake from Kitty and the Dead Man’s Hand that is precisely what the title says.

I don’t love how insecure Ben is here.

“Kitty and the Super Blue Blood or Whatever Moon Thing” is another silly bit.

“Defining Shadows” is not just one of my favorite stories set in Kitty’s world, it’s one of my favorite supernatural mystery stories. Detective Hardin get stuck with a murder where half a body (the lower half) is found standing upright in a shed–and they can’t figure out who or what killed her.

Particularly fascinating is how Hardin decides to deal with the culprit she discovers.

“Bellum Romanum” here we see one of the Big Bads of the series, and how he got his power to attempt to destroy the world. I’m not quite sure how I feel about this story.

“Kitty Learns the Ropes” was a story I’d read previously and completely forgotten. It’s a story about someone being outed as a supernatural–to the detriment of his current career. It’s interesting to consider both the concept of outing someone against their will as well as whether they have an unfair advantage in things, being a supernatural.

“Kitty Busts the Feds Story” is set after the series ends, and is essentially Kitty discovering that the government is developing an agency for dealing with supernatural creatures. Which really, it seemingly would have done earlier in the series.

Although there are some excellent stories in this anthology, there are also some weak stories that felt more like asides rather than full-fledged stories. But I think it’s worth reading because the good stories are quite good.

Tachyon Publications
Rating: 7.5/10

The Immortal Conquistador (2020) Carrie Vaughn (Kitty Norville)

Set in the Americans, 1500s to present.

This has four stories and a surrounding tale.

“Conquistador de la Noche” (2009) Subterranean Online
“El Hidalgo de la Noche” (2015) First time in print
“El Conquistador del Tiempo” (2019) Original appearance
“Dead Men in Central City” (2017) Asimov’s Science Fiction

Ricardo de Avila was a third son who chose to go to the new world to make his fortune. But Coronado didn’t find the city of gold–instead they found starvation and natives who were easily slaughtered.

Ten years later, Ricardo discovered that monsters were real, and he was to become one himself.

“You should know that you never had a chance against us. Perhaps you might take comfort in that fact.”

“I take no comfort,” Ricardo said, his words spitting.

“Good. You will have none.”

“Conquistador de la Noche” is one of my favorite stories. Ever. It tells how Rick was turned–and fought to become more that just a mindless monster.

What I love about this story is that it shows just how complicated Rick / Ricardo is. He is a man of faith who is turned into a monster, but refuses to believe that God has completely abandoned him.

His baptism had been burned away from him. The Mother Church was poison to him now. God had rejected him.

But I do not reject God, Ricardo thought helplessly.

Captain Ricardo de Avila, you must accept what you are, let the creature have its will.”

Ricardo smiled. “I am a loyal subject of Spain and a child of God who has been saddled with a particularly troublesome burden.”

This book gives us the stories of Rick’s past–of how he refused to give into the evil within him, and for five hundred years remained an enigma among vampires.

The second story finds Rick discovering he is no longer the only of his kind in the new world–and the decisions he makes to save the people he has cared for, for a century.

The third story, “Dead Men in Central City” tells of how Ricardo met Doc Holliday. That was the fun story in this book.

The fourth story tells of the month where Ricardo became the Master of Santa Fe for a month. There are parallels to the second story here, where he does his best to protect the humans around him–quite unlike the other vampires.

“Some of our kind seem to enjoy blood that tastes like fear. I never understood that.”

“You prefer your blood to taste of what, generosity?”

“Kindness, I think.” Maybe even love.

What I love most about Rick / Ricardo is he is quite unlike any other vampire I’ve read. He never wanted to be a vampire, and refused to allow his changing to turn him into a monster.

Publisher: Tachyon Publications
Rating: 9/10

The Sentry (2011) Robert Crais

This is definitely a book I haven’t read before!

This is also a book focusing on Joe Pike.

Let me be clear, I don’t dislike Joe. I just prefer Elvis. But I see to be in a minority, from this blurb by Robert Crais about Joe Pike.

Like Elvis Cole, Joe had always gotten a lot of mail from women, but the tone of his mail now changed. They sent gifts. They sent pictures. They wrote, “I love Joe Pike,” but not in a way suggesting they were fond of him or maybe kinda crushing on him. Pike’s fans were feral. They said, “I WANT Joe Pike.”

Meaning: Pike is my love slave!

I get it. It is not lost on me that the young male heartthrobs in the current crop of insanely successful vampire films are all brooding bad-boy loners, held in check from their evil ways only by the love of a good woman, who is herself moved by their tortured hearts. Has any vampire been as lethal as Joe Pike, or as tortured?

Pike is the ultimate bad boy. He is dangerous, enigmatic, and male with a capital M, but it is his damaged soul that makes him sexy with a capital S. His lack of emotion suggests an inner landscape so damaged it is as barren as the desert surrounding Tikrit. It also suggests an emptiness waiting to be filled, and therein lies Pike’s tragic nature and, I suspect, the sexy-hot core of his huge appeal. My female readers intuit that he is redeemable, and an awful lot of them want to help with his redemption!

I was thinking about this last night–about characters who are are as damaged as Pike is. I came up with Carrie Vaughn‘s Cormac (a minor character who eventually got his own book), in that they both are poorly socialized men who have honed themselves into killers–but killers who have a strong personal sense of right and wrong.

The other examples I thought of aren’t quite right: Hawk, from Robert B. Parker’s Spenser series is a very affable man, and functions well in society. Simon Green’s John Bloody Taylor is messed up, but has a sense of humor. Mike Carey’s Felix Castor is extremely messed up, but he also makes tons of mistakes and repents his errors.

There’s not anything wrong with Joe Pike, it’s just that I don’t get why so many people love characters like him. They’re silent and brooding and have no sense of humor. Yetch.

Regardless, in this book Pike comes across two gang members beating up a small business owner, and steps in. The man wants to forget everything, but when his niece comes in, everything changes.

She started her car and gave him a parting smile. “If you’re going to be dangerous, you might as well be dangerous for me.”

Pike said nothing.

“Do. You. Get. It?”

“You don’t understand.”

“What? What don’t I understand?”

“War is what I do.”

Pike hung up.

John Chen has morphed into something rather different from when he started.

John Chen was corrupt. A paranoid with low self-esteem, Chen lived for the headline, and this was normally Cole’s ace. Cole often gave Chen information that allowed him to make breakthroughs on cases he would not have made otherwise.
…
Chen, whose obsessions in life revolved around women and money, currently drove a Porsche Boxster. The women had so far eluded him.

I prefer this description to having to read Chen’s obsessions with sex.

But I did like this bit. It gave him a bit more humanity than that first description.

All you have to do is look at me. I’m the guy defense attorneys make out to be the bumbling geek, so juries laugh. I hear cops making cracks when I’m at a scene. Every time I look in a mirror, I know why the girls laugh.”

“John, you don’t have to—”

Chen held up a finger, stopping him.

“When I first met you guys, I was freakin’ terrified of Joe. He was everything that scares me shitless. Here’s this guy, and no one would have the balls to make a crack or laugh. Here he is, a fucking street monster, but of all the people I deal with, he treats me with more respect than anyone else.”

Chen lifted the bag.

“So I will find a way to do this.”

Regarding military service, it is not mentioned when Cole or Pike served, but service in the desert is alluded to.

The young troops Pike knew, fresh back from the desert, called it spider-sense, taking the term from the Spider-Man movies. They told him if you humped the desert long enough you developed a sixth sense that tingled like angry ants when the crosshairs found your skin. Pike had humped jungles, deserts, and pretty much everywhere a man could hump for most of his life, and now he felt the tingle.

And I still appreciate Cole’s appreciation of food and his interesting in cooking.

The joy of cooking was oblivion. Slicing and seasoning made it easier not to think.

It’s those little things that make Elvis Cole so much more interesting to me than Pike.

However, there were two bits at the end that I particularly liked.

SPOILER (rot 13)

Cvxr fnj gur ohyyrgf uvg ure, ubj ure fuveg chpxrerq naq evccyrq. Ur fnj ure rlrf syhggre, naq ure zbhgu bcra nf vs fur qvqa’g xabj jung unq unccrarq. Fur ernpurq hc gb gbhpu fbzrguvat gung jnfa’g gurer, gura sryy. Cvxr qvq abg tb gb ure. Ur ghearq naq fnj Ryivf Pbyr, fgvyy ubyqvat uvf tha.

Cvxr fnj gur grnef fcvyy qbja Pbyr’f snpr. Cvxr jngpurq uvf sevraq pel, naq arvgure bs gurz zbirq.

That, again, is why I like Cole so much.

But this however, made Joe for once seem human.

Pbyr jrag gb gur fyvqref nf Wbr Cvxr pnzr guebhtu gur sebag qbbe. Cvxr jnf senzrq va gur qbbe sbe n zbzrag, fheebhaqrq ol yvtug, gura ur fuhg gur qbbe naq pnzr bhg bagb gur qrpx.

Gurl fgbbq snpr-gb-snpr, arvgure bs gurz fcrnxvat, gura Cvxr chyyrq uvz pybfr, naq uhttrq uvz. Qvqa’g fnl n jbeq, whfg uhttrq uvz, naq jrag gb gur envy.

So it’s a good book, but I enjoyed the Elvis Cole bits more than the Pike bits, even though I did like seeing Pike make poor choices.
Rating: 7.5/10

Published by G.P. Putnam’s Sons

Magic Bites (2007) Ilona Andrews

This is another series that I’ve fallen behind reading. Unlike Carrie Vaughn’s Kitty series, these books are still coming, but I’m two books behind on my reading, and I’ve forgotten some major points, so I figure it’s time to re-read.

Magic returned to the world, destroying much technology as it came. It also returned creatures that were once believed to be myths and stories: Vampires. Shape-shifters. Mages.

Kate is a magic user and a fighter who belongs to the Mercenary guild. Her guardian is a member of the Order of Knights of Merciful Aid, a group to which Kate was encouraged to join, despite her issues with authority.

IIRC, the hardest thing about reading this book for the first time was the world-building. It is NOT a dystopia (I really don’t enjoy dystopias) but it is our world where things have gone really unexpectedly screwy, so although the foundations may seem familiar, there is much that is different.

Magic could not be measured and explained in scientific terms, for magic grew through destroying the very natural principles that made science as people knew it possible.

The theory is that since so many people are ignorant of the basic mechanical principles involved in making the phone work, to them it might just as well be magic.

If you haven’t read the series before, just be aware that the world-building might be a bit overwhelming, but it’s well-worth it to keep going.

Kate is a very interesting character.

Survival took precedence over fashion. Sure, I didn’t weigh a hundred and ten pounds, but my narrow waist let me bend and I could break a man’s neck with my kick.

She is very much of the kick-ass and take names school of fantasy, which I do love (although I also love other types of female heroines as well) and Kate does get hurt–although the magic makes her recovery much faster it seems.

The upside of having a magic sword was that its secretions liquefied the undead flesh. On the downside, the blade had to be fed at least once a month, or it would become too brittle and break.

So, good book, good series, enjoyable, read it.

However.

Ilona Andrews gets some of THE WORST covers I have ever seen. See that cover up top? It is the reissue cover, and it is the exception that proves the rule. The cover to the right? That’s the original cover.

It’s HORRIBLE. Go ahead and zoom in to look at it some more. It’s like they weren’t even trying when the made this.

It’s like they had a high school intern mash together some random pictures in photoshop and that’s what they slapped on the book.

Ace regularly gives them abysmal covers, and I cannot understand why? The cover at the top of the post? That’s a good cover. They put some effort into it, and it gives you a good idea of what you’re getting: fantasy with a strong female heroine.

Most of their other titles? Those make me feel like someone at the publisher has it in for them, and WANTS to keep them from selling books.

I point this out because I am well-aware that the authors have zero control over their covers, but it is inexplicable that Ace keeps giving them terrible covers.

Of course, Avon is just as bad, but really, why can’t they get good covers?
Rating: 8/10

Published by Ace

Kitty Saves the World (2015) Carrie Vaughn

The final Kitty book.

It’s all come to a head as they attempt to find and take down Roman, as they suspect he is attempting to destroy the world.

“Hey,” Ben said in greeting. “What’s up?”

“You’re not going to like it,” Cormac said. Which was a hell of a greeting. I’d have asked, How bad could it be? But this was Cormac, and my imagination failed me.

I liked that it was a plausible way of destroying the world–the method of which had been brought up a couple books earlier. I like that kind of planning.

And I really loved the rationale as to why Kitty was important.

“But there’s one thing I couldn’t change. One part of His creation I couldn’t break: free will. No matter how monstrous I made you, the vampires and werewolves, my soldiers and my children, I couldn’t make you be monsters. You still had a choice, to follow me or not.

I’m always a fan of free will, and I love the idea that for all that monsters were made for evil, they had the free will to fight for good.

Of course most of the characters who survived earlier books made an appearance here, albeit just a brief appearance in many cases.

I’m glad I went back and re-read the series before this final book. It allowed me to see the hints she’d been dropping for quite awhile as to how things might turn out.
Rating: 8/10

Published by Tor

Low Midnight (2014) Carrie Vaughn

Book thirteen and all that’s left is the finale.

This is NOT a Kitty book, this is a Cormac and Amelia book.

Amelia had insisted on putting magical protections on the laptop, a protective rune here and an arcane mark there. Cormac wasn’t sure electronics worked that way, that magic worked that way. It couldn’t hurt, Amelia had said. But it could, if it screwed up the computer’s inner workings.

We had electricity even in my day, Amelia had said grumpily. It’s all wires and power in the end. Making connections and letting in or keeping out energies that might be dangerous. Trust me.

His e-mail account had been strangely free of spam since he set it up.

This is quite different from the Kitty books, because Cormac is a very different character from Kitty. For example, he calls Kitty to let her know he is off to do something dangerous, but then doesn’t call her back to tell her he’s safe.

I’d want to kill Cormac.

I do like the back-and-forth between Cormac and Amelia.

You know, he thought to Amelia, nobody says spinster anymore.

Well, yes, certainly. Etymologically, the word was doomed, considering so few of the women called spinsters actually spun wool anymore. So what do people call unmarried adult women now?

Um. Women, he said.

Ah.

That still amuses me.

Cormac still ends up dealing with shady characters, and I do appreciate this quick summation of Layne.

“Nice place,” Cormac answered. “Family farm?”

“Someone else’s family,” Layne replied. “I got it cheap in a foreclosure a couple years ago.”

Which was Layne all over, really.

Although this book is primarily about unlocking the cypher to the Book of Shadows Kitty got in the previous book, I do like the look at Cormac and Amelia and am glad it ended up being more than just a short story.
Rating: 8/10

Published by Tor

Kitty in the Underworld (2013) Carrie Vaughn

I still don’t like this story.

Rick is gone and Angelo is acting Master of Denver.

Roman has taken out one of the master vampires who was on their side, and everyone is worried that war is coming.

Meanwhile, Kitty gets kidnapped by a group led by an insane vampire, and instead of escaping when she has the chance, she stays.

I just have so very many problems with this story. First, they kidnap Kitty, then they claim they need her to voluntarily work with them. Besides the excuse of the vampire being insane, there is no reason they couldn’t have approached her directly for her help. The whole kidnapping and locking her up thing makes no sense.

Additionally, if a were is cut by a silver knife on an appendage, couldn’t they just cut off that arm or leg and survive? Why don’t they?

I just don’t understand why Kitty behaves as she does in this book, not at all, which makes it a frustrating read.

Published by Tor

Kitty Rocks the House (2013) Carrie Vaughn

Kitty is back in Denver, slowly rebuilding her show after the fall-out of her keynote speech in London. She and Rick are also working to build forces against Roman, a slow and very daunting prospect.

Having recently re-read Rick’s origin story, his actions in this book are far more understandable, but I don’t quite understand why he and his visitor aren’t more forthcoming about the dangers surrounding them–especially as those dangers did seem transferable to Kitty.

There is also an issue with a new wolf who wants to move into Denver. I do like how Kitty resolves that issue.

And I still find Cormac breaking his arm to be hilarious.

But not one of my favorite books.
Rating: 6.5/10

Published by Tor

Kitty Steals the Show (2012) Carrie Vaughn

Kitty, Ben, and Cormac are all headed to London. Kitty and Ben to attend the First International Conference on Paranatural Studies, Cormac to look for Amelia’s family.

Luckily, Kitty has friends across the ocean, including Emma, Allete’s great(s)-granddaughter, and Tyler and Schumacher representing the US government’s interests.

We also meet some very interesting people, and get a look at how Old World vampires treat others (ie, not very well).

One of the characters I especially liked was Ned, the Master of London.

“Of all the secrets I could keep, the ones about myself are the least useful.”

He was a window into an amazing time and place— and I didn’t know where to start. So I teared up and tried to wave away the burst of emotion. Everyone was staring at me and all I really wanted to do was cry from the wonder of it all.

“Is she okay?” Emma asked Ben.

“I don’t know,” he said. “I’ve never seen her like this.”

“I get this reaction quite a lot,” Ned said cheerfully. I imagined it was one of the reasons he didn’t bother keeping his identity secret— he’d been a celebrity his whole life, why stop just because he’d become a vampire?

I think that is one of the things I like best about this series–is coming back to the idea that if vampires have lived for centuries, then they have to have met at least some important historical figures–and they certainly can tell us more about the times in which they lived than any history book.

“I will have Shakespeare, Marlowe, and John Donne scholars camped on my doorstep for the rest of eternity. Do you have any idea what I’d go through?”

I also liked the bits about the conference and just how technical and geeky it might get.

When the lecture opened with a physics joke—“ Vampires: alive or dead? Does Schrödinger’s cat walk among us?”— I knew I was in trouble.

Otherwise, the story is roaring along with more machinations by Roman and/or his people.
Rating: 7.5/10

Published by Tor