{"id":2586,"date":"2008-08-20T08:00:16","date_gmt":"2008-08-20T12:00:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/?p=2586"},"modified":"2008-08-19T19:55:41","modified_gmt":"2008-08-19T23:55:41","slug":"please-leave-a-message-after-the-pithy-remark","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/archives\/2586","title":{"rendered":"Please Leave a Message after the Pithy Remark"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>We apologize, but we are unable to entertain you today.<\/p>\n<p>Please accept one of the following excuses:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/random_michelle\/2772019280\/\" class=\"tt-flickr tt-flickr-Medium\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm4.static.flickr.com\/3199\/2772019280_285325656b.jpg?resize=500%2C375\" alt=\"Kat_0007\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\" border=\"0\" \/><\/a> <\/p>\n<p>I am unable to be entertaining because the cat ate my mouse.<br \/>\nI am unable to be entertaining because 12 pounds of cat is demanding my attention.<br \/>\nI am unable to be entertaining because the cat got behind my computer and pulled out all the plugs.<br \/>\nI am unable to be entertaining because I cannot see my computer screen.<\/p>\n<p>Once you have selected your desired excuse, please move into the lounge and relax until entertainment returns.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We apologize, but we are unable to entertain you today. Please accept one of the following excuses: I am unable to be entertaining because the cat ate my mouse. I am unable to be entertaining because 12 pounds of cat is demanding my attention. I am unable to be entertaining because the cat got behind [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[21,15,1],"tags":[40],"class_list":["post-2586","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-cats","category-depression","category-uncategorized","tag-cranky"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pefxA-FI","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2586","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2586"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2586\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2586"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2586"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2586"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}