Went back to the gym today after more than a week off. Discovered I gained three pounds on vacation. This isn’t surprising, considering how much we ate, and how many days we had of doing next to nothing.<\/p>\n
However, I mention this fact because it brought to mind the fact that I have no body image. <\/p>\n
Seriously. <\/p>\n
120 and 155 all look the same to me, and the only difference is how my clothes fit. So I have almost no gauge as to how I look. Doesn’t mean I haven’t tried to figure it out, however, looking in the mirror only causes me to look for flaws (thus we don’t have a full length mirror in the house). <\/p>\n
The scale is also a problem, which is why I don’t have one in the house, and why I try to step on the scale only a couple times a week at the gym. Because lacking a body image, the only thing I really have to go by are the numbers on the scale, and those aren’t exceedingly reliable (water retention anyone?)<\/p>\n
So how does some one develop a realistic body image? How do I learn what the numbers on the scale really mean? I know that my BMI is perfectly normal, but again, what does that mean? How do I learn to see myself as others see me? Is there even such a thing as an objective opinion on weight and body size?<\/p>\n
The rational part of my brain goes, “this is unimportant and doesn’t matter in the slightest,” however, the OCD part of my brain grasps onto those numbers and wants to know what they truly mean. The rational part of my brain goes, “it doesn’t matter, stop thinking about it,” while the OCD part of my brain goes, “think of all those horribly dressed college students you see throughout the day. You don’t want to end up like THAT do you?” (Like that I mean dressing in a completely unflattering matter. So many females would be gorgeous if they dressed in something other than the “current styles.”)<\/p>\n
So how do I learn these things? How do I internalize something that is completely external?<\/p>\n
(And the first person to tell me “you look fine,” gets a smack. That’s not what this post is about.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Went back to the gym today after more than a week off. Discovered I gained three pounds on vacation. This isn’t surprising, considering how much we ate, and how many days we had of doing next to nothing. However, I mention this fact because it brought to mind the fact that I have no body […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2935","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-depression"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pefxA-Ll","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2935","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2935"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2935\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2935"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2935"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/notreally\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2935"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}