{"id":11206,"date":"2018-11-11T19:39:40","date_gmt":"2018-11-12T00:39:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/?p=11206"},"modified":"2024-03-19T15:05:44","modified_gmt":"2024-03-19T19:05:44","slug":"the-utterly-uninteresting-and-unadventurous-tales-of-fred-the-vampire-accountant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/11206","title":{"rendered":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant"},"content":{"rendered":"

The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant<\/a><\/em> (2014) Drew Hayes<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Often after finishing a book that I really enjoy, I am at a loss as to what I want to read next. Something completely and totally different typically works best.<\/p>\n

This was perfect for that.<\/p>\n

I recorded my journeys in the hopes that, should another being find themselves utterly depressed at the humdrum personality still saddling their supernatural frame, they might find solace in knowing they are not the only one to have felt that way.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Frederick the accountant was as surprised as anyone else to discover himself a vampire. He had none of the qualities one expects from pop culture as a vampire, and was, in fact quite happy being an accountant. So that’s what he kept doing after being turned.<\/p>\n

Even if he did enjoy some of the perks of being a vampire.<\/p>\n

I was more than a minor klutz in my human days, so it was an enjoyable change to walk around without injuring myself.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(Contrary to popular mythology, I neither sleep in a coffin, nor am I rendered powerless during the daytime. The difference between the two is that in the daytime I can sleep, which is an ability I lack under starlight. I don\u2019t have to, and in fact spent three weeks without any rest during last year\u2019s tax season;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

This is a series of five novellas, woven into a single book.<\/p>\n

It’s also silly and utterly delightful.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf they\u2019re so good, then why does anyone ever gamble with them?\u201d I asked. <\/p>\n

\u201cBecause they share their ancestor\u2019s weakness as well as their strength.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey eat virgins?\u201d Albert asked uncertainly. <\/p>\n

\u201cWhat? No. They can\u2019t resist a bet.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Fred ends up becoming friends with a number of other preternatural creatures, and they show the secret world to be just as varied as the real world.<\/p>\n

I wondered if Bubba would need the number of a good mechanic to buff out the dents in his roof, then realized Bubba was the kind of person who was perfectly capable of fixing that himself.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Because friend dislikes violence and confrontation, and because he is honest and truly likes being an accountant, he is the exact opposite of every other vampire hero you’ve come across. Which is what makes the book so silly and fun. <\/p>\n

If you’re looking for something silly and fun, I highly recommend Fred, the Vampire Accountant.<\/p>\n

Publisher: REUTS Publications
\nRating: 8\/10<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant (2014) Drew Hayes Often after finishing a book that I really enjoy, I am at a loss as to what I want to read next. Something completely and totally different typically works best. This was perfect for that. I recorded my journeys in the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[12,2,16],"tags":[259,260,313],"class_list":["post-11206","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-8-10","category-fantasy","category-supernatural","tag-drew-hayes","tag-fred-the-vampire-accountant","tag-vampires"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/piQkW-2UK","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":24215,"url":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/24215","url_meta":{"origin":11206,"position":0},"title":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant, Audio Book","author":"Michelle","date":"January 30, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant, Audiobook (2014) Drew Hayes narrated by a full cast: Christopher Walker, Nora Achrati, Scott McCormick, Alejandro Ruiz, Bradley Smith, Carolyn Kashner, Ken Jackson, Terence Aselford, Richard Rohan, Rose Elizabeth Supan, Mort Shelby (Fred, the Vampire Accountant #1) \u201cWell, if\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "8.5\/10"","block_context":{"text":"8.5\/10","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/category\/8-5-10"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred the Vampire Accountant","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/The-Utterly-Uninteresting-and-Unadventurous-Tales-of-Fred-the-Vampire-Accountant.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":17530,"url":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/17530","url_meta":{"origin":11206,"position":1},"title":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant","author":"Michelle","date":"June 24, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant (2014) Drew Hayes I really adore this book. Without being crass, let me simply say an undead body handles normal food as a human one handles gum. While not built for nourishment, it is capable of disposing of such\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "8.5\/10"","block_context":{"text":"8.5\/10","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/category\/8-5-10"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred the Vampire Accountant","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/The-Utterly-Uninteresting-and-Unadventurous-Tales-of-Fred-the-Vampire-Accountant.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":12285,"url":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/12285","url_meta":{"origin":11206,"position":2},"title":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant","author":"Michelle","date":"November 24, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant (2014) Drew Hayes I've read quite a few new releases recently, so I've been interspersing them with books I really liked and wanted to re-read. Hence, returning to The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "8.5\/10"","block_context":{"text":"8.5\/10","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/category\/8-5-10"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred the Vampire Accountant","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/The-Utterly-Uninteresting-and-Unadventurous-Tales-of-Fred-the-Vampire-Accountant.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":23837,"url":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/23837","url_meta":{"origin":11206,"position":3},"title":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant","author":"Michelle","date":"August 5, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant (2014) Drew Hayes (Fred, the Vampire Accountant #1) I was more than a minor klutz in my human days, so it was an enjoyable change to walk around without injuring myself. \u201cWell, if it sweetens the pot any, I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "9\/10"","block_context":{"text":"9\/10","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/category\/9-10"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred the Vampire Accountant","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/The-Utterly-Uninteresting-and-Unadventurous-Tales-of-Fred-the-Vampire-Accountant.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":12351,"url":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/12351","url_meta":{"origin":11206,"position":4},"title":"Undeading Bells","author":"Michelle","date":"January 1, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Undeading Bells (2019) Drew Hayes It's almost time: Fred and Krystal's wedding day is almost here! Geez, Freddy, all those old movies you love, maybe work some classic action flicks in there occasionally. I\u2019m more or less a parahuman secret agent and long-time loner on the verge of settling down\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "8\/10"","block_context":{"text":"8\/10","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/category\/8-10"},"img":{"alt_text":"Undeading Bells","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/Undeading-Bells.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":12344,"url":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/12344","url_meta":{"origin":11206,"position":5},"title":"The Fangs of Freelance","author":"Michelle","date":"December 28, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"The Fangs of Freelance (2017) Drew Hayes The fourth Fred the Vampire book. My name is Fredrick Frankford Fletcher, and I am an accountant by trade. Also, I\u2019m a vampire. Yes, I probably should have led with that second bit, but to be honest, the accountant part factors far more\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "8\/10"","block_context":{"text":"8\/10","link":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/archives\/category\/8-10"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Fangs of Freelance","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/The-Fangs-of-Freelance.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11206","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11206"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11206\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11206"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11206"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/klishis.com\/reading\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11206"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}