While doing laundry, I realized that I had “We Three Kings” running through my head. Only not the whole song, just the dark verse that you probably only know if you were raised Catholic.

Myrrh is mine, its bitter perfume
Breathes of life of gathering gloom
Sorrowing, sighing, bleeding, dying
Sealed in the stone-cold tomb

As I type I am installing MS Vista onto my work laptop (the one that’s been a PITA since day one.)

I’ve become comfortable enough with Office 2007 to say that as different as it is it’s not the horrific nightmare I was expecting.

We’ll see how Vista goes.

ADDENDUM the First
Not impressed so far. Couldn’t figure out how to access the network. We’ll see how things look on Monday when I’m not thinking so much about going home.

That’s IT. That’s ENOUGH already. Really.

No more bad news. I mean it.

Otherwise I’m going to just hide in my basement and stop talking to people.

Got an interesting question this morning:

“Can I print out my voice mail messages?”

How does that go? “Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic?”

You’d definitely need magic to be able to accomplish that one.

(You’re lucky–I skipped a rant about why this is completely impossible with our current technology.)

It’s almost 8:30 and it’s 0 degrees F. We’re waiting for my Dad to come by to jump start our car, so we can go buy a new battery.

Yup.

It’s Monday.

When The Departed first came out, Michael and I were in the middle of getting the house ready for my grandmother to move in, so we didn’t make it to see any movies for about three months, so I was pleased to see that because of the Oscars, the local theaters brought back The Departed (despite the fact it comes out on DVD in little more than a week.)

Yay for that, because I loved The Departed.

I went in expecting to dislike Leonardo diCaprio. I don’t know what it is, but I haven’t been impressed with him since What’s Eating Gilbert Grape? (Mind you, because of that I also tend to avoid movies he is in.) I also went in expecting to like Matt Damon, who I’ve loved since Dogma.

I ended up surprised, in that I was really impressed with Leonardo di Caprio. I thought he did a fantastic job, and I ended up really enjoying his character.

I was also thoroughly unimpressed with Jack Nicholson. He didn’t seem Irish. He didn’t seem South Boston. He instead seemed transplanted in from elsewhere, while everyone else seemed like they belonged where they were. Maybe I’m missing something, and maybe I’ve been watching all the wrong movies, but I just don’t understand why everyone likes Jack Nicholson so much. He always seems like the same person to me in the movies I’ve seen.

And also–yay for Mark Wahlberg! Once I got past the fact that every other word out of his mouth was “fuck” I really liked his character.

So thanks to the theaters for bringing back The Departed so we could see it in the theaters. Now I have to figure out all the other movies I missed in the fall and want to see…

They finally have a release date for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

I’m torn as to whether I want to pre-order it or not. I didn’t last time, but ended up buying a copy the first day it went on sale (but not at a midnight sale thank you) and reading the whole thing in almost one sitting.

If I pre-order it from Amazon, at least I won’t have to leave the house to pick up my copy. But the release date is Saturday, so maybe I should just pre-order it from a local bookstore.

Or maybe I’ll forget to pre-order it, and pick it up the first day it comes out like I did with the last book.

Of course the best part about all of this is seeing people all excited about the release date of a book.

Guess with Pantheon of Gods I should be worshiping…
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Just for the heck of it, I went to Amazon to see if they had a release date for the second season of The Wild Wild West.

They DO!

I’ve pre-ordered!

Now I have something to look forward to in March–Jim West and Artemus Gordon. In COLOR!

I hope I liked it in color. We had a black and white TV when I was watching reruns of The Wild Wild West, so I don’t think I’ve ever seen an episode in color.

These are some of the wireless networks available from my living room.
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More bits and pieces.

Yesterday my Great Aunt–my grandmother’s sister–went into the hospital. They’re still not sure what happened, but she should be stepped down to a regular room tomorrow.

Michael’s grandmother is still in the skilled care facility, and her kidney function is still poor.

On a positive note, we just started watching season 6 of Deep Space Nine. My all time favorite.

Everyone needs something to look forward to.

Helped our friend Kim rewire her basement on Saturday. She needed a new outlet for a chest freezer, so it made sense since we were already adding a new breaker and outlet, to go ahead and have more outlets (you can never have too many electrical outlets) and fix some of her lights, so they were all on a switch.

I was startled to discover just how much I’ve finally learned about wiring and electricity and other household maintenance. Michael installed the breaker, cut a length of wire to the junction box and then on for the new outlet, and then said, “Michelle, go ahead and wire up this outlet for me,” and without a second thought I did it.

Then I ran the wire for the second outlet and wired up the second outlet, explaining to Kim everything I was doing, and then helped Kim wire up the third.

Then I realized that I’d managed to do it all without having to ask Michael anything.

I felt so… useful!

As an added bonus, Kim (who does not particularly like Science Fiction) did not kill us, when Michael, Mike, and I (yes, that does get a bit confusing) kept saying, “Aziz! Light!” anytime a flashlight was needed.

But I do think she was starting to consider it.

I think what I found most amusing, was that the last question was, “Do you read the bible” and my answer was “No.”

I just read a lot about religion is all.

Too bad it doesn’t tell me what I missed. I’m pretty sure it was one or both of the “which book follows which book” questions.
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As I mentioned earlier, Michael’s Grandmother’s health is failing. In fact, that’s an optimistic way of putting it I think. She’s lost kidney function and has refused dialysis. When we traveled to see her, she was barely coherent, and spent most of our visit asleep.

As a small update, she’s been moved into a skilled nursing facility, which is a facility that’s between a hospital and a nursing home. They’re giving her 30 days to show signs of improvement, and then they’re most likely going to place her into hospice.

It’s hard, putting those words down like that. They sound cold and hard–and I suppose in a way they are. They don’t really share the details of the situation, such as how unhappy his grandmother has been since the death of her husband (Michael’s grandfather, just to be clear.)

What do you do with someone who has lost all interest in living?

Theoretically, her depression should have been treated. However, depression in the elderly often goes untreated, so this came less as a surprise and more as a disappointment. For some reason people seem to assume that the elderly should be depressed.

This is, of course, patently false. They elderly should be no more depressed than any average person. However a variety of circumstances, from failing health, to the deaths of friends and spouses, to the loss of independence, to over-medication and drug interactions, conspire to place elders in a fragile state.

And now as my grandmother has moved in with us, I wonder and fear whether I’ll miss the signs if and when they appear. I have knowledge, but that doesn’t mean I’ll know enough to take action.

It’s a hard line to walk, allowing someone to live their own life, and knowing when to take action to improve their quality of life. When someone reaches the state Michael’s grandmother has, where she no longer enjoys life, it seems cruel to take any steps to increase her life span. Yet, wasn’t it our responsibility to keep her from reaching that state in the first place?

Despite all I have read and studied and pondered, I don’t know the answers to these questions. I know what I believe, which is that life is to be valued. But I still don’t know what that means, what actions I should take in response to that belief.

Life is a funny thing. You have to laugh at it. I just don’t know what to do when someone has stopped laughing.