Here’s the second addition to Things that Never Happen to Other People.

About ten years ago my friend Andy had a party, and after a lot of sitting around drinking, we decided that we should take a walk outside to sober up a little. There were about 8 of us, and we ended up stopping and talking in front of a little grocery store, because there was light there.

Now, having had a bit to drink, I thought it would be fun to climb on top of the coke machine and look down over everyone, and having done this, another friend thought that was an awesome idea, and so we switched places. As we were chatting, suddenly THREE police cars come roaring up, and the cops all jump out and start yelling at us.

As I said there were eight of us, and we ranged in looks from punk (I was dressed entirely in black with a black leather jacket and combat books), to goth, to normal college dress (Andy was in jeans, white t-shirt, and sneakers).

After yelling at my friend to get the hell down, we start getting questioned as to what we were doing. “We’re just standing here talking,” we all replied.

“Why are you here?” One office in particular, Office Ford, was very hostile and aggressive towards us, getting in our faces to ask us questions.

“We were sitting around drinking and decided that we wanted to take a walk to sober up,” we replied.

At this Officer Ford decided he had us nailed, “How old are you?” he growled at me. “Twenty six,” I replied. He looked startled and then got in Andy’s face, “How old are YOU then?” “Twenty-two” was the reply. He then went after the goth chick who was dressed to look rather young, and got the response, “Twenty six.”

At this point the other cops had backed off, because they realized that we were really just innocently walking around the neighborhood, and although sitting on top of a coke machine was not the wisest thing to have done, we certainly weren’t harming anything. If anything, we were trying to be responsible in sobering up and not drinking till we were out of control.

But not Officer Ford. He gets right in Andy’s face and starts yelling about us walking around and climbing on things. And Andy, who doesn’t like authority even when he is sober, gets right back in his face exclaiming that we have a constitutional right to walk wherever we damned well please, whenever we please. Office Ford doesn’t like this at all, and goes into a tirade, which eventually ends with, “Damned kids! Bustin’ shit up! ‘S’why my insurance rates are so high!”

Luckily, the other offices realizing that we were neither kids nor “bustin’ shit up,” talk him back into his vehicle and leave us alone.

From then on, “damned kids, butsin’ shit up,” has been our “damned kids get off my lawn.”

I have no idea if Officer Ford is still around, but I do know that some time after the ‘bustin’ shit up’ incident, he pulled over a friend and scared him into an unreasonable search of his car (See: “Why would I steal an Eight Track?”). So I assume he was just one of those angry cops who doesn’t like kids and really had no business being a police officer in a college town.

I’ve got two Life Long Learners classes today, and then tomorrow a whole family trip to visit my other grandmother who has stopped eating.

So I won’t be around much today.

But if I am around, I was reminded yesterday of one of those stories of things that only happen to me. It all hinges on the phrase “Damned kids! Bustin’ shit up! ‘Swhy my insurance rates are so high!”

Which makes it related to another story involving a party in the first, the punch line of which is, “It’s an EIGHT track. Why would I steal an EIGHT TRACK?”

Have a great day!

Happy Year of the Rat!

.

Why do fire alarms bring out the worst stupidity in people?

If I say the facility has to be emptied, why would you think this doesn’t include you?

No, we’re not going to leave you alone in here with all these computers.

No, we’re not going to stick around so you can finish your Facebook post.

Get. Out. NOW.

There’s nothing like a little upbeat music to make things better. Of course people have different ideas of upbeat. My upbeat tends to be a bit on the angry side..

(more…)

Small update.

I talked to my happy doctor yesterday, and the conclusion is that my mood is a reasonable reaction to the events in my life, and not backsliding into depression.

So yay. I think.

However, last night I was told that my other grandmother’s health has taken a turn for the worse. I haven’t gotten much in the way of details, but it does seem serious. So that’s not so good.

Plus?

I have to go to the dentist this morning and get a filling replaced.

Happy Wednesday!

Feel free to share dental horror stories here, to make me feel better about my own trials and tribulations. Winner gets one of the cookies I made Monday.*

*You have to come to my house to pick up the cookie.

ADDENDUM the First:
Back from the dentist. If not for the fact that half of my entire freaking head is number from the damned Novicane (I think the dentist really likes Novicane entirely too much), it wasn’t too bad.

Except for the fact I can’t actually eat lunch now, because I can’t feel my mouth, and don’t need to get food and drool all over myself.

As if we didn’t already know it… the handful of Republicans in the state are apparently raving lunatics.

Huckabee wins WV Republican convention

I’m really starting to have come concerns about my state.

ADDENDUM the First:
Apparently, Huckebee won only because McCain and Paul supporters chose Huckabee to keep the delegates from going to Romney.

I’m not sure if that makes me feel better or not.

Have some random amusement that came through the e-mail last week.
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That’s the thing about depression. It sneaks up on you when you aren’t paying attention, and just when you think that everything’s hunky dory, BAM.

Okay, it’s not quite that bad, but I’ve been in a funk for the past week that I just can’t seem to shake. Worst part is I know what’s wrong, but it’s all out of my control. Which is not such a good thing for someone with OCD.

So lemme get it all out and see that gets it off my mind.

First and foremost is the recurring issue that I’m not going to bring up in a public space. Michael and I spent a lot of time discussing this issue this evening, and I’m once again back to the mantra, “it’s not me, it’s her.”

Secondly, something I haven’t much talked about, is that several older women in my life are seriously ill and or dying. Michael’s grandmother has slowly failing kidneys, and has been refusing dialysis for the past year, so it’s only a matter of time. She’s in a nursing home, and with her physical problems, doesn’t get out of bed very much.

Then my cousin’s grandmother (I actually spent a lot of time with my cousin’s grandparents when I was younger. They were a lot of fun.) suffered a series of small strokes, and is now under hospice care in a nursing home. I was sent a picture two weeks ago, and was shocked to see how thin she has become. It’s hard, because she wants to go home, but that’s is physically impossible at this point.

The just before New Year’s, my other grandmother had a series of small strokes, and is currently in a rehab center. She is also apparently suffering from dementia, and her lucidity comes and goes.

And then there is the fact that I have a horrible phobia of nursing homes. As in, it’s so bad just the idea of going into one freaks me out (as in nausea and hyperventilating freaking out), and I haven’t set foot in one since I was eight. (Long story at an impressionable age) So: guilt and depression.

That is not to say that I’ve done nothing. I write weekly, and we send flowers regularly, to cheer up their rooms. But it’s not the same as being there. And being me, I always feel like there is more I should be doing.

Is there anything I could plausibly be doing? I don’t know. Is there anything else I should be doing? Probably not if I want to retain my sanity. Are there things I should be doing? Yeah, I need to do a better job safeguarding my own mental health. Problem is, taking care of myself feels like I’m wasting time when I could be doing something more useful for other people, even though I know I do a crappy job taking care of others when I’m depressed. (Hey! Catch 22!)

So what do I do? Take my meds. Exercise. Write my letters. Send flowers. Take care of myself. Relax.

Why are these things always easier said than done?

Anway, to cheer myself up this evening, I made a batch of Jeri’s “Ought to Be Illegal Cookies.” I don’t know if they’re quite as good as the double chocolate cookies I make with peanut butter chips (also from the Alice Medrich book.) but they are pretty darn good, and they hit the spot. And now I have something to take to work tomorrow for Mardi Gras.

Now if you’ll pardon me, I think it’s time for a hot relaxing shower, and then some time to curl up and read before bed.

Coming around full circle, Jeri posted her son’s list of “classic” movies.

Now I won’t even claim to even know a classic movie if it bit me on the nose. But I do have some all time favorite movies.

So, in no particular order, some of my favorite movies:

Lost Boys
Arsenic & Old Lace
The Matrix
Star Wars
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon
The Princess Bride
Boondock Saints
Batman Begins
Fight Club
The Fifth Element
The Italian Job
Iron Monkey
Monty Python: Search for the Holy Grail

No, I don’t much like dramas. Why do you ask?

And for comparison, movies I quote the most:

The Princess Bride
Singles
Search for the Holy Grail
Airplane

Yes, really. Singles. Though really, TV shows get quoted a lot more around here, especially “Firefly” and “Deep Space 9”

Res tuas cura.

Mind your own business.

Nolo ire!

Do not go!

Nil homini certum est.

Nothing is certain to man.
– Ovid

According to WAJR, the User Fee was overwhelmingly defeated today. (I haven’t found it anywhere else, and the Dominion Post website (like the paper) is worthless.)

I’m disappointed, but not surprised. Local roads are a mess, but traffic is not going to improve until we’re willing to spend the money to make the desperately needed changes.

I suppose that to some this may seem trivial, but I’ve grown up here, and the changes in traffic, especially over the past decade, are incredible, and it’s all due to the fact that Morgantown is a small town that never expected the traffic associated with 30k students. Our two lane roads simply cannot accommodate the number of cars trying to move through town every day, and despite attempts to improve things, the situation gets worse every year.

University and Beechurst have to be widened, as does the Mileground. Unfortunately, the longer we put off these projects, the worse the traffic gets, and the more horrific things will be during construction. Unfortunately, with the failure of the user fee, these renovation projects remain on the back burner, while traffic continues to back up, and trips that should take two minutes stretch out to 30.

It continues to astound me that every time a levy or bond issue comes up in Morgantown, it is soundly defeated. As if we can continue to function without better roads, without a new high school, without improved emergency facilities and vehicles.

Everyone loves to bitch about the traffic, but apparently no one wants to do anything about it.

One more cat picture.

Spy Kat! He’s starting out of your monitor to see what you’re doing!

Now make sure you behave yourself.

I’m feeling cruddy, and was looking for a picture of “The Pit of Despair” to describe how I was feeling today, when I got distracted and found a Princess Bride quiz.

Surprising no one, I’m Valerie.

Which Princess Bride Character are You?
this quiz was made by mysti

Perhaps my day will become better, now that I’m in the mood to follow Michael around the house going, “LIAR! LIAR! LIIIIIAAAAAAAR!”

(I’m not a witch I’m your wife!)