Life is still ridiculous, but I did take a bit of time off to hike–and to read.

I’ve had trouble focusing–not a tremendous surprise–so I’ll need to go back and reread the new releases I’d been waiting for at some point when I’m a little less distracted. In other words, take those ratings of 7 with a grain of salt–I need a book to draw me in and not let go, and that these books didn’t do that is on me, not necessarily them.

There were some very good stories however. I finally got around to reading Richard Osman‘s Thursday Murder Club, which I loved.

Tania got me the Murderbot short story, Compulsory, which I didn’t even know was being published, and I’m eagerly awaiting the next story that comes out this fall. (MURDERBOT!)

Although it didn’t pull me in, I still enjoyed Anna Lee Huber‘s most recent Lady Darby book. It’s comforting to drop into familiar places with known characters.

To keep me moving, I’ve been listening to a lot of audio books.

I just finished the last recorded SPI Files book, (She self-published the next two stories, so no audio version) and had to struggle to figure out what I wanted to listen to next.  (We merged my parent’s audible account with ours, so when I browsed today, I kept seeing books my parents listened to, which was weird.)

Other than that, lots of rereading. Favorites, to pull me out of my own head and allow me to escape.

Mystery

• The Thursday Murder Club (2020) Richard Osman (Thursday Murder Club) 9/10
• Come Unto These Yellow Sands (2011) Josh Lanyon 9/10
• A Fatal Illusion (2023) Anna Lee Huber (Lady Darby) 8/10
• Against the Currant t (2023) Olivia Matthews (Spice Isle Bakery) 5/10

Fantasy

• Child of a Rainless Year (2005) Jane Lindskold 9/10
• Hard Spell (2011) Justin Gustainis (Occult Crimes Unit Investigation) 8/10
• A Queer Trade  (2016) K.J. Charles (Rag and Bone)  7.5/10
• That Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Human (2023) Kimberly Lemming (Mead Mishaps) 7/10
• Once a Rogue (2023) Allie Therin (Roaring Twenties Magic) 7/10

Romance

• Lancaster Stories by C.S. Poe: Kneading You (2016) 7.5/10, Joy (2017) 9/10
• Garnet Run by Roan Parrish: Better Than People (2020) 8/10, Best Laid Plans (2021) 8/10, The Pride of Garnet Run  (2022) 7/10
• Teacher of the Year (2023) M.A. Wardell (Teachers in Love) 6.5/10

Science Fiction

• Compulsory (2023) Martha Wells (The Murderbot Diaries) 8.5/10

Audio Books

• A Dangerous Collaboration, Audio Book (2019) Deanna Raybourn narrated by Angèle Masters (Veronica Speedwell) 8/10
• SPI Files by Lisa Shearin narrated by Johanna Parker: The Grendel Affair, Audio Book (2014) 8/10, The Dragon Conspiracy, Audio Book (2015) 8/10, The Brimstone Deception, Audio Book (2016) 8.5/10, The Ghoul Vendetta, Audio Book (2017) 8/10

Ethical Fashion

Roughly 160 million children were subjected to child labour at the beginning of 2020, with 9 million additional children at risk due to the impact of COVID-19. This accounts for nearly 1 in 10 children worldwide. Almost half of them are in hazardous work that directly endangers their health and development.

14 states have either introduced or enacted legislation rolling back regulations that governed the number of hours children can be employed, lowered the restrictions on dangerous work, and legalized subminimum wages for youths.

Packers Sanitation Services paid a $1.5 million fine for employing 102 children to work in dangerous meatpacking facility jobs across eight states. Last summer, Reuters revealed that children as young as 12 — many of whom were migrants — were hired to work in a metal shop owned by Hyundai.

The media campaign to legitimize sweatshop economics & child labor

In Bangladesh, poor children under the age of 14 work as child laborers an average of 64 hours a week.

Children as young as 6 work up to 110 hours a week.

On average the children earn less than $2 a day. Some less than $1 a day.

How To Tell If A Child Made Your Clothes

Dangerous Jobs: Kids Under 18 Cannot Do This Work: Meat Processing and Slicing, Power-Driven Woodworking Machinery, Mining, Logging, Forestry and Sawmilling

US Dept. of Labor confirms Iowa’s new child labor law violates federal law:

Amputations, fractured fingers, second-degree burns and head trauma are just some of the serious injuries suffered by US meat plant workers every week,

Around a quarter of U.S. domestic produce is picked by an army of child workers who numbered an estimated 500,000 in 2021.

In Iowa, a new law allows children as young as fourteen to work in industrial laundries, and, with approval from a state agency, allows sixteen-year-olds to work in roofing, excavation, demolition, the operation of power-driven machinery, and other dangerous occupations. Jennifer Sherer, a co-author of the E.P.I. report, said, “Iowa’s new law contains multiple provisions that conflict with federal prohibitions on ‘oppressive child labor.’ ” It also limits employer liability for the injury, illness, or death of a child on the job. Adolescents are almost twice as likely as adults to be injured at work.

Packers Sanitation Services allegedly used child labor at three meatpacking plants in two states, according to the Labor Department.

The DOL asked a federal court to issue a statewide injunction and restraining order against the company for its alleged crimes at plants in Grand Island, Nebraska, Worthington, Minnesota and Marshall, Minnesota.

The past two months have been hellish.

To sum up: my mother died unexpectedly and my brother and I have been dealing with all the things.

So I read nothing by comfort reads for several weeks, and have been slowly reading some of the new releases I had been looking forward to.

Fantasy

A Matter of Magic (1988) Patricia C. Wrede (Mairelon the Magician) 9/10

Cecelia and Kate series by Patricia C. Wrede & Caroline Stevermer
Sorcery & Cecelia: or The Enchanted Chocolate Pot (1988) 8/10, The Grand Tour: Or, The Purloined Coronation Regalia (2004) 8/10, The Mislaid Magician: or Ten Years After (2006) 8/10

Supernatural Fantasy

Big Bad Wolf series by Charlie Adhara
The Wolf at Bay (2019) 8.5/10, Thrown to the Wolves (2019) 9/10, Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing(2020) 10/10, Cry Wolf(2021) 10/10

Mystery

Mystery on the Menu: A Three-Course Collection of Cozy Mysteries (2023) Nicole Kimberling 8.5/10
The Deadliest Fall (2023) Charlie Cochrane 7/10
A Newlywed’s Guide to Fortune and Murder (2023) Dianne Freeman (Countess of Harleigh 7.5/10

Romance

Jericho Candelario’s Gay Debut (2018) R. Cooper 10/10

Science Fiction

The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells
All Systems Red (2017) 9.5/10, Artificial Condition (2018) 9.5/10, Rogue Protocol (2018) 10/10, Exit Strategy(2018) 10/10, Network Effect (2020) 10/10, Fugitive Telemetry (2021) 9.5/10

Audio

Small Vices, Audio Book (1997) Robert B. Parker narrated by Burt Reynolds (Spenser) 10/10
Blitz, Audio Book(2022) Daniel O’Malley narrated by Moira Quirk (The Rook Files) 10/10
A Treacherous Curse, Audio Book (2018) Deanna Raybourn narrated by Angèle Masters (Veronica Speedwell) 8/10
Alex Verus series by Benedict Jacka narrated by Gildart Jackson
Veiled, Audio Book (2015) 7/10, Burned, Audio Book (2016) 5/10

It’s Pride Month! Of course I think you should celebrate by reading queer books!

Here are some recommendations across several genres, and I went ahead and noted when a book had explicit sexual content (if that’s something you’d prefer to avoid). There are multiple cozy mysteries, lots of fantasies, and even some low- or no-spice romances, so you should be able to find a book that might appeal!

Several authors are quite prolific, so I’ve (mostly) listed the books / series I thought might be good starting points, but if you click through to an author page, there are plenty of other books (as well as my reviews) available to peruse.

Additionally, I’ve been working on updating my book pages, and now have a section for queer books! There you can peruse all the authors I’ve read and reviewed, and find lists of their books and series.

I’m still trying to rebuild my book database, but since I’ve forgotten most of what I knew about building databases, that is a bit of a slog. In the meantime, I do have a spreadsheet you can view! One tab is for mental health, neurodiversity, and ace rep. The other tab I started after listening to a Book Riot: When in Romance episode on heroines in STEM (I’m added to the list they shared).

Mystery

• Lindenshaw Mysteries by Charlie Cochrane
• The Best Corpse for the Job (2014), Jury of One (2016), Two Feet Under (2018), Old Sins (2019), A Carriage of Misjustice (2020), Lock, Stock and Peril (2022)
• MM | Mystery, Cozy, Amateur Sleuth + Cop | Queer author

• Grasmere Cottage Mystery series by Dahlia Donovan
• Dead in the Garden (2018), Dead in the Pond (2018), Dead in the Shop (2018)
• MM | Mystery, Cozy, Amateur Sleuth | Queer author

• Secrets and Scrabble series by Josh Lanyon
• Murder at Pirate’s Cove (2020), Secret at Skull House (2020), Mystery at the Masquerade (2021), Scandal at the Salty Dog (2021), Lament at Loon Landing (2023), Body at Buccaneer’s Bay (2021)
• MM | Mystery, Cozy, Amateur Sleuth + Cop

• Mystery on the Menu: A Three-Course Collection of Cozy Mysteries (2023) Nicole Kimberling
• MM | Mystery, Amateur Sleuth+ Cop | Explicit sexual content | Queer author

• Snow & Winter series by C.S. Poe
• The Mystery of Nevermore (2016), The Mystery of the Curiosities (2017), The Mystery of the Moving Image (2018), The Mystery of the Bones (2019), Interlude: Snow & Winter Collection Volume One (2021), The Mystery of the Spirits (2021)
• MM | Mystery, Amateur Sleuth + Cop | Explicit sexual content

• Come Unto These Yellow Sands (2011) Josh Lanyon
• MM | Mystery | Explicit sexual content

• Murder Most Actual (2021) Alexis Hall
• FF | Mystery | Queer author

Historical Mystery

• Dead Dead Girls (2021) Nekesa Afia (Harlem Renaissance Mystery)
• FF | Mystery, Historical (post WWI)

• Pentecost and Parker by Stephen Spotswood
• Fortune Favors the Dead (2020), Murder Under Her Skin (2021)
• Bisexual heroine | Mystery, PI, Historical (post WWII)

• Page & Sommers series Hither, Page (2019), The Missing Page (2022) Cat Sebastian
• MM | Mystery, Historical (post WWII), Romance, Amateur Sleuth + Spy | Explicit sexual content

• The Will Darling Adventures by K.J. Charles
• Slippery Creatures (2020), The Sugared Game (2020), Subtle Blood (2021)
• MM | Mystery, Historical (post WWI), Amateur Sleuth + Spy | Explicit sexual content

• The Lords of Bucknall Club by J.A. Rock and Lisa Henry
• A Case for Christmas (2021), A Sanctuary for Soulden (2021)
• MM | Mystery, Alternate History (Napoleonic Era), Romance | Explicit sexual content

Fantasy / Historical Fantasy

• An Island For Two (2022) Ophelia Silk
• FF, Ace | Fantasy, Romance

• Legends & Lattes (2022) Travis Baldree
• FF | Fantasy

• Last Binding by Freya Marske
• A Marvellous Light (2021), A Restless Truth (2022)
• MM / FF | Historical Fantasy (pre-WWI), Romance | Explicit sexual content

• Montague Siblings by Mackenzi Lee
• The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue (2017), The Gentleman’s Guide to Getting Lucky (2019), The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy (2018), The Nobleman’s Guide to Scandal and Shipwrecks (2021)
• MM | Historical Fantasy (1700s), YA

• Magic in Manhattan by Allie Therin
• Spellbound (2019), Starcrossed (2020), Wonderstruck (2021)
• MM | Historical Fantasy (post WWI), Romance | Explicit sexual content

• The Kingston Cycle by C.L. Polk
• Witchmark (2018)
• MM | Fantasy, Mystery | Queer author

• Paladin’s Hope (2021) T. Kingfisher (The Saint of Steel)
• MM | Fantasy, Romance | Explicit sexual content

• The Affair of the Mysterious Letter (2019) Alexis Hall
• Trans character | Fantasy | Queer author

Supernatural Fantasy

• The House in the Cerulean Sea (2020) TJ Klune
• MM | Fantasy | Queer author

• The Tarot Sequence by K.D. Edwards
• The Last Sun (2018), The Hanged Man (2019), The Hourglass Throne (2022)
• MM | Fantasy | Sexual content | Queer author

• Adam Binder series by David R. Slayton
• White Trash Warlock (2020), Trailer Park Trickster (2021), Deadbeat Druid (2022)
• MM | Fantasy | Queer author

• Big Bad Wolf series by Charlie Adhara
• The Wolf at the Door (2018), The Wolf at Bay (2018), Thrown to the Wolves (2019), Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing (2010), Cry Wolf (2021)
• MM | Fantasy, Mystery, Law Enforcement | Explicit sexual content

• Grilled Cheese and Goblins: Adventures of a Supernatural Food Inspector (2018)
• Nicole Kimberling
• MM | Fantasy, Mystery, Law Enforcement | Explicit sexual content | Queer author

• Human Enough (2019) ES Yu
• MM | Fantasy, Romance, Mystery, Law Enforcement

• Shadow Police by Paul Cornell
• London Falling  (2014), The Severed Streets (2015), Who Killed Sherlock Holmes? (2016)
• Queer character in ensemble | Fantasy, Mystery, Horror, Law Enforcement

• Magic, Lies, and Deadly Pies (2022) Misha Popp
• Bisexual heroine | Fantasy, Mystery

Romance

• London Calling series by Alexis Hall
• Boyfriend Material (2020), Husband Material (2022)
• MM | Romance | Queer author

• Waiting for the Flood (2018) Alexis Hall (Spires)
• MM | Romance | Queer author

• Aidan Wayne: stand-alone romances
• Loud and Clear (2016), Play It Again (2019), Not So Cookie Cutter (2019)
• MM, Ace, Disability rep | Romance | Queer author

• Jericho Candelario’s Gay Debut (2018) R. Cooper
• MM | Romance | Queer author

• The Agency series by Ada Maria Soto
• His Quiet Agent (2017), Merlin in the Library (2018), Agents of Winter (2022)
• MM, Ace | Romance

• N.R. Walker: stand-alone romances
• Galaxies and Oceans (2018), Upside Down (2019)
• MM, Ace | Romance | Explicit sexual content

• American Dreamer (2019) Adriana Herrera (Dreamers)
• MM | Romance | Explicit sexual content

• The Charm Offensive (2021) Alison Cochrun
• MM, Ace | Romance | Explicit sexual content

• Perfect Rhythm (2017) Jae
• FF, Ace | Romance | Explicit sexual content | Queer author

• The Heartbreak Bakery (2021) A.R. Capetta
• Trans/NB Character | Romance, Fantasy, YA | Queer author

• The Love Study (2020) Kris Ripper
• NB, Bisexual | Romance | Sexual content | Queer author

Historical Romance

• Feminine Pursuits by Olivia Waite
• The Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics (2019), The Care and Feeding of Waspish Widows (2020)
• FF | Historical (1816), Romance | Explicit sexual content

• Band Sinister (2018) K.J. Charles
• MM | Historical (early 1800s), Romance | Explicit sexual content

Comics

• Mooncakes (2019) Suzanne Walker, Wendy Xu
• FF | Fantasy, YA, Comic

• Heathen by Adriana Herrera
• Heathen Volume 1 (2017), Heathen: Volume 2 (2019), Heathen, Volume 3 (2020)
• FF | Historical Fantasy, Comic

• Check, Please! by Ngozi Ukazu
• # Hockey (2018), Sticks & Scones (2020)
• MM | Romance, Comic

Science Fiction

• The Janet Watson Chronicles by Claire O’Dell
• A Study in Honor (2018), The Hound of Justice (2019)
• FF | Science Fiction, Mystery

• The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells
• All Systems Red (2017), Artificial Condition (2018), Rogue Protocol (2018), Exit Strategy (2018), Network Effect (2020), Fugitive Telemetry (2021)
• NB, Ace, Aro | Science Fiction

Fiction

• Last Night at the Telegraph Club (2021) Malinda Lo
• FF | Historical (1954), YA | Queer author

• The Boy in the Red Dress (2020) Kristin Lambert
• Queer | Historical (1930), YA

A majority of rereads again this month, however, I did read some new books, finishing up Charlie Cochrane‘s Cambridge Fellows series, and the most recent Secrets and Scrabble book, which although just published, comes before the 7th book, which was published last fall.

I’ve also moved onto books in the Alex Verus series I hadn’t read before–although honestly I remember little of the books I had read.

Many of my rereads were Ace romances, including Loud and Clear, Blank Spaces, Three Stupid Weddings,  An Island For Two, and The Rat-Catcher’s Daughter. Several of the others were romances with toxic families, including Family Man and Bee Cave Magic or romances with differently-abled or neurodivergent characters, like Loud and Clear, It Takes Two to Tumble, and The Lawrence Browne Affair, which all drew my back for different reasons.

Also, after reading several mysteries that were not what I was hoping them to be, I reread the Page & Sommers series and restarted the Big Bad Wolf series.

Mystery

• Page & Sommers by Cat Sebastian
  Hither, Page (2019) 8.5/10, The Missing Page (2022) 9/10
• Cambridge Fellows by Charlie Cochrane
  Lessons for Suspicious Minds (2013) 7/10, Lessons for Idle Tongues (2015) 5.5/10, Lessons for Sleeping Dogs (2015) 6/10
• Lament at Loon Landing (2023) Josh Lanyon (Secrets and Scrabble) 6/10

Fantasy

• The Wolf at the Door (2018) Charlie Adhara (Big Bad Wolf) 8.5/10
• An Island For Two (2022) Ophelia Silk 7/10

Romance

• Loud and Clear (2016) Aidan Wayne 9.5/10
• It Takes Two to Tumble (2017) Cat Sebastian (Seducing the Sedgwicks) 9/10
• And Everything Nice (2016) Ada Maria Soto 9/10
• Love, Marriage, and a Baby Carriage (2016) C.S. Poe 9/10



• Blank Spaces (2016) Cass Lennox (Toronto Connections) 8.5/10
• The Lawrence Browne Affair (2017) Cat Sebastian (The Turners) 8.5/10
• Family Man (2013) Heidi Cullinan and Marie Sexton 8/10
• Bee Cave Magic (2020) Kelly Fox 8/10
• Three Stupid Weddings (2018) Ann Gallagher 7.5/10
• The Rat-Catcher’s Daughter (2019) K.J. Charles (Lilywhite Boys) 7.5/10
• Team Phison (2017) Chace Verity 7/10
• Saying The Right Thing (2017) Aidan Wayne 6/10
• Medium, Sweet, Extra Shot of Geek (2019) R. Cooper 6/10

Audio Book

• A Perilous Undertaking, Audio Book (2017) Deanna Raybourn narrated by Angèle Masters (Veronica Speedwell) 8/10
• Alex Verus series by Benedict Jacka narrated by Gildart Jackson
  Taken (2014) 7/10, Chosen (2014) 8/10, Hidden (2014) 7/10

The latest episode of Book Riot’s SFF Yeah discussed Characters Who Make Us Feel Seen, and I decided to wander down the path of what fictional characters am I most like?

I had an extremely hard time coming up with SFF characters, because I very feel rarely like the characters you find in SFF books. There might be bits and pieces that fit perfectly, but as a whole? Not so much.

Mysteries were even harder, because although I am ridiculously curious, I am anxious, so I couldn’t sneak into a house where people were sleeping or walk into a situation and confront people.

I had a far easier time with characters from romance novels, probably because I read a lot of books with broken or struggling characters. I’ve read many books in recent years that have resonated deeply with me–far more than any other genre.

So here are some characters who make me feel seen.

Murderbot, from the Murderbot series by Martha Wells.

Obviously not the murdering parts, but often something Murderbot says will hit me like a punch.

“Why don’t you want us to look at you?”

My jaw was so tight it triggered a performance reliability alert in my feed. I said, “You don’t need to look at me. I’m not a sexbot.”

Murderbot exists to protect people, to help people, but it doesn’t want to have to directly deal with people, and it really doesn’t want to have to make conversation.

I didn’t want to be stuck in a chair within easy unwanted talking range.

Interacting meant talking, and eye contact. I could already feel my performance capacity dropping.

Murderbot also loves comfort reading / watching.

(T)here wasn’t time to start anything new before we reached the station. (Being interrupted isn’t nearly as annoying when I already know the story.)

The first book, All Systems Red, might only have 150 pages, but I have 60 passages highlighted.

(If I got angry at myself for being angry I would be angry constantly and I wouldn’t have time to think about anything else.) (Wait, I think I am angry constantly. That might explain a lot.)

Discworld by Terry Pratchett

I decided there had to be at least one character in Discworld who I felt like. I came up with two: The DEATH OF RATS and The Librarian.

The Librarian has a strong sense of justice and a love of books, is typically misunderstood, and is fine with who he is and resists any attempts to change him into a human.

The Librarian rolled his eyes. It was strange, he felt, that so-called intelligent dogs, horses and dolphins never had any difficulty indicating to humans the vital news of the moment, e.g., that the three children were lost in the cave, or the train was about to take the line leading to the bridge that had been washed away or similar, while he, only a handful of chromosomes away from wearing a vest, found it difficult to persuade the average human to come in out of the rain. You just couldn’t talk to some people.

The DEATH OF RATS is often silly, coming up with ridiculous ideas.

NO, YOU CAN’T RIDE A CAT. WHO EVER HEARD OF THE DEATH OF RATS RIDING A CAT? THE DEATH OF RATS WOULD RIDE SOME KIND OF DOG.

Neither is a main character, but both make themselves felt when around, and both enjoy what they do.

Cooper Dayton from the Big Bad Wolf series by Charlie Adhara

I’m not brave and would make a terrible secret agent, but things Cooper says and thinks are things that have gone through my mind repeatedly.

Cooper wondered who he’d be without any of the negative experiences of his life. Was it even worth asking?

“I’m sorry,” Cooper blurted. His heart was beating hard, but fuck it, what were they here for if not this?

Park looked at him. He had that same odd look on his face he’d had when they first got to Jagger Valley that looked so much like nerves, but a little hopeful, too. “For what?”

“Everything. Well, for earlier, and for being, you know, me.” Cooper laughed awkwardly.

“What the hell, Dayton,” Park said, sounding angry. “That’s a horrible thing to say.”

(Both quotes from The Wolf at Bay.)

I try to hear Park being angry when I find myself apologizing for being me.

the frustration that came from relearning what he could and couldn’t do for the second time in less than two years threatened to tip him over the edge from restlessness into depression.

Not two right on top of one another, but I’ve had a life-altering injury, and I know how much hard work it takes to come back from that, and to learn the new ways your body works (or doesn’t).

Sam from Play It Again by Aidan Wayne

With Sam, we get closer to things that mirror my life–and not just working at an IT help desk.

(W)ith his job being IT, there were often good reasons he came home having exhausted his social-skill quota for the day and was only up to playing some games or reading a book before crashing. Books and video games also didn’t yell at you, or snidely act as though you were a waste of space.

(T)alking on the phone gave him enough anxiety as it was. Never knowing whether a call might turn nasty made him dread it every time he was given a ring.

To be clear, I love helping people and working help desk type positions when the users were polite and nice, but even a single rude or horrible person can ruin my day and send my thoughts spiraling.

I’m a vegetarian. I don’t mind if other people aren’t of course, it’s not my job to regulate, but it’s my own difference I’m making, yeah? I’m a gentle soul, really. I can’t even squash bugs; I try to catch them and take them outside. No reason to harm a spider if there isn’t need, after all. And they’re such good bugs, spiders are. I mean arachnids. And sorry, there I seem to have gone off on a tangent.

I feel like this is something I may actually have said, right down to the spider tangent.

People in general made Sam nervous, but he’d mentioned a few times how he was “slightly bothered” by crowds especially, particularly noisy ones. He’d said it in the same offhand way Sam used to downplay all the things that made him unhappy or caused him distress.

Fred the Vampire Accountant series by Drew Hayes

Like Discworld, I thought through the characters in the Fred the Vampire Accountant series to see if anything clicked, and decided I am most like Alfred and Charlotte.

Charlotte because she likes taking care of people and is also extremely protective of those who living within her, and Alfred because he’s kind and as much of a pacifist as he can be. Also, he frequently misses social cues.

Zach from That Kind of Guy by Talia Hibbert (Ravenswood)

Zach has learned to recognize the ways he puts others first–even to doing things he didn’t like.

In truth, Zach was a messy fucker who resented his own compulsion to fill in other people’s gaps but couldn’t make himself stop.

What he did feel was a familiar tug in his chest, that nagging pull he always experienced when faced with someone who needed something. It was an urgent whisper he couldn’t ignore: You’re the only one people can rely on. That makes it your duty to help.

UGH. I recognize that pull, and how hard it is to stop doing things you don’t want to solely to please those around you. It’s ridiculously hard to say no when you’ve said yes for so long.

(H)e’d made himself a promise, recently. One designed to break his habit of handing out Yeses he didn’t mean.

That is a far harder thing to do than you’d think–people assume you’ll do as they ask, and get mad when you don’t, so you have to come up with reasons and excuses, which is exhausting.

Ruth from A Girl Like Her by Talia Hibbert (Ravenswood)

Like Zach, Ruth makes me feel seen.

She wasn’t graceful. She was, in fact, the opposite of graceful. He worried for her safety once every five seconds at least. When she poured half of the hot water onto the counter, he was only surprised that she didn’t scald herself in the process.

She rolled her eyes and picked up the mugs. He deftly took them from her and carried them into the living room, as if she wasn’t capable of handling it herself. True, she usually spilled tea everywhere. But her balance would never get better if she didn’t practice.

Spoiler: practice doesn’t help.

Ruth disliked phone calls—it was hard to really hear someone’s words, when you couldn’t see their face

Ruth realised that she was rubbing her own hands—wringing them, people said—and made herself stop, even though the action was calming.

It’s so affirming to see someone else deal with things I thought were my own quirks.

Now she didn’t know if she should laugh or gasp. She compromised by choking on her own spit.

Yes, I’ve done that too.

Clem from An Unseen Attraction by K.J. Charles (Sins of the Cities)

I have reread this book multiple times and have more than 80 highlights, mostly of Clem.

Look me in the eyes, boy! had been a constant refrain at school, but they said the eyes were the windows to the soul, and Clem didn’t feel comfortable peering into people’s windows.

Rowley had thought at first the beast had no name; it had taken him a while to understand that it had a perfectly good, descriptive name to which it was as likely to answer as any other, and that name was Cat. There was something terribly Clem about that.

I annoyed a friend as a kid, because I didn’t give my stuffed animals “real” names.

“But, but—” Clem flailed a hand. Mark snatched his pint out of the way.

There is a reason people do not set their drinks near me.

He’d spent his life carefully not looking into an abyss of rage like the pit of hellfire he’d so often been told awaited pagans, because if he ever really looked, he feared he might be angry forever.

Jordan from Upside Down by N.R. Walker

Jordan is another character that makes me feel seen on multiple levels.

My phone beeped in my hand and I tripped over my own feet, almost falling to the ground but catching myself just in time. “Motherfucker.”

I mean.

Geek also probably fits, though mostly for Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. I mean, the other Star Treks are fine and I don’t disparage anyone for liking them—Janeway and Picard are credible—but I just prefer Sisko as my captain,

“There has to be a reason you picked Sisko.”

He smiled at me and seemed to relax before launching into a spiel on consistency and compassion and how Sisko’s being a father in the show made him more relatable.

The only way that would have been better was if Garak had also been brought up.

“Good afternoon,” he said, grinning as I walked up to take my seat.

“Top of the day to you, kind sir,” I replied, for no other reason than I’m an idiot.

Ugh. Ugh ugh ugh. I do that all the time.

“We had the early learning kids in today. That’s always fun, if not rather loud, but I like reading to them. I make it exciting and interactive so they all think books and reading time is amazing, so I’m like a superhero to them. And being a superhero to a bunch of three-year-olds is a civic responsibility I take very seriously.”

I love finding a book that a kid loves almost as much as I love making them enthusiastic about things and pointing out wonders they might not have noticed.

Bonus Quotes

Some passages floor me every time I read them.

“You’ve been through a lot today,” he said. “There’s no need to diminish it.”

“Yeah, but if I don’t diminish things I have to face them at their normal size, and that’s horrible.”

— Boyfriend Material by Alexis Hall

(H)e’d effectively removed the stressor I carried with me every minute: the fear that if I had to choose, I would choose wrong and something terrible would happen.

— Rend by Roan Parrish

It would be nice to believe in something like God. To believe some higher power with a greater purpose was concealed behind the violence and chaos.

—Come Unto These Yellow Sands by Josh Lanyon

This is the story of my life: standing on the edges of things and worrying, when I’m supposed to just walk through them.

— Waiting for the Flood by Alexis Hall

“I’m more interested in someone’s excitement over something they have just discovered, than someone’s smug, pompous insistence that there is a right and a wrong way to learn to love something.”

— Hottie Scotty and Mr. Porter by R. Cooper

I keep having thoughts I didn’t authorise.

— Work for It by Talia Hibbert