Thieves’ World, Book 2: Tales From the Vulgar Unicorn

Thieves’ World, Book 2: Tales From the Vulgar Unicorn (1980) edited by Robert Asprin and Lynn Abbey

Introduction by Robert Lynn Asprin
Spiders of the Purple Mage by Philip José Farmer
Goddess by David Drake
The Fruits of Enlibar by Lynn Abbey
The Dream of the Sorceress by A.E. van Vogt
Vashanka’s Minion by Janet Morris
Shadow’s Pawn by Andrew J Offutt
To Guard the Guardians by Robert Lynn Asprin
Essay: The Lighter Side of Sanctuary by Robert Lynn Asprin

Again, I absolutely cannot recommend the eBook version of this anthology. The number of errors were no better than the first half/book.

But as a story, this is where it really starts to get good. The first book is really an introduction. Now, most of the main characters are here (with a few notable exceptions) and their personalities are starting to become consistent across stories.

The anthology begins, as usual, with the Introduction by Robert Asprin. And like the first book, we begin with Hakiem giving us the lay of the land–in this case, the decline of the Vulgar Unicorn since the disappearance of One Thumb. Many of these stories are set–or at least spend time in–the Vulgar Unicorn, and it’s fun how much worse the place gets every time.

Spiders of the Purple Mage by Philip José Farmer is a story set in, but really separate from, Thieves’ World. This is the only story Philip José Farmer contributed, but I have to admit that it’s one that always stuck with me–despite the ridiculous title. (Don’t get me wrong, it’s amusing, but also terrible.)

I like Masha, and I really like Smhee.

“I’ve been looking for him for thirteen years. During that time… I have had to break some of my own vows and commit crimes which I must pay for when I return to my land.”

“Won’t she pardon you for these because you have done them in her name?” Masha had said.

“No. She accepts no excuses. She will thank me for completing my missions, but I must still pay.”

I really like both the fact that there are no excuses for doing wrong, and that Shmee does what he has to anyway.

But remember, this is Thieves’ World, so no good deed goes unpunished.

David Drake’s story, Goddess introduces Samlor hil Samt, who appears twice more in the series, but isn’t really a part of Thieves’ World. Despite that, I also enjoyed this story.

Well, maybe not enjoyed. But it was good. I love how not describing things makes them more awful.

One group of carvings made clear the unguessed unity between “sorcerer” Hast-ra-kodi and the “goddess” Dyareela. Samlor stared at the conclusion of the pattern, swallowing hard but not speaking.

It also amuses me how Dyareela is always referred to as a horrible, terrible goddess, but we only ever get bits and pieces.

The Fruits of Enlibar by Lynn Abbey is another Illyra story, where we learn she has a half-brother who is just as damned as everyone else in Sanctuary, but still hopes Illyra can help him.

The Dream of the Sorceress by A.E. van Vogt is another story with a character who makes a but a single appearance in the series, but who does integrate many other members of Sanctuary into his story. And I find this description of Ilsigi amusing.

The Ilsig language, suddenly, did not seem to be a sufficient means of communication. Stulwig had heard that it’s verbal structure was despised by Rankans who had learned the speech of the conquered race. The verbs–it was said–were regarded by Rankans as lacking force. Whereas the conqueror’s tongue was alive with verbs that expressed intense feeling, absolute propose, uttermost determination.

That makes me want to study linguistics.

And then, with Vashanka’s Minion by Janet Morris, we meet Tempus Thales.

“You have doubted it repeatedly… You have been unruly, faithless though you pledged me your troth. You have been, since you renounced your inheritance, a mage, a philosopher, an auditing Adept of the Order of the Blue Star, a–”

“Look here, God. I have also been a cuckold, a foot soldier in the ranks, a general at the end of that. I have bedded more iron in flesh than any ten other men who have lived as long as I.”

I think that passage tells you much of what you need to know about Tempus. Someone who is willing to interrupt and argue with his God probably isn’t going to care two figs about any mere mortals.

Shadow’s Pawn by Andrew J Offutt–for me, not Thieves’ World book is truly complete without a Shadowspawn story–gives us a taste of the future of the series, with Hanse and Tempus appearing in each others’ tales, and one story building upon the other.

This is where it starts to get good, and where the intrigue and nastiness really get started.

To Guard the Guardians by Robert Asprin shows us precisely how nasty the inhabitants of Sanctuary can get. A story where a vivisectionist isn’t even the nastiest person in this book.

And we close with Essay: The Lighter Side of Sanctuary by Robert Asprin, which always cracks me up.

“Every year tourists flock to Sanctuary by the tens.”

That ALWAYS makes me giggle.

“There is no shortage of willing workers in Sanctuary. You’ll find most citizens are for hire and will do anything for a price.”

Again, I recommend you skip the eBook and instead look for a paper copy of the book. You should be able to find a half decent used copy.
Rating: 8/10

Published by Ace Books

 
 

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